My first flower

Assalamualaikum and Hi!

I'm not a fan of flower, really. Plastic flower or fresh flower, neither one of them is my favourite. Since, forever! This is because, I'm not a romantic type of person. I'm an easy going, direct, non-flowery, but a sweet person. lol *Let's face it, guys. Despite, I'm an acah-acah writer.*

I couldn't remember when was the first time I told F, I really want a flower. Not a plastic, but the fresh flower. It was last year. So, he was like...

-..-

"Are you serious? Are you eating insect or what?"

Okay guys, here's another thing.. my boyfriend is not romantic. At all. He prefers food for me rather than a fresh flower. Even sekuntum. Say bye-bye to a bouquet of fresh flowers. Yeah, he's that stingy. Kidding! Actually, both of us are not romantic type. We'll puke when we see ourselves in this circle. Hence, the dialogue I created above.

Yesterday, during my jogging workout time, he whatsapp-ed me a photo. At first, I thought it was his own photo, but.. he sent me this.

Perfect combination of plastic and fresh flower.

Saving alert!

He made it himself. From dry leaves, and it looks like a rose. Actually, the moment I look at the picture, I know it REALLY looks like a rose, Instead, I asked him, what's the picture and all. You know, a mental torture. In case, he gives up and starts buying me fresh flower everyday. LOL. But so kesian that I have to cut my mental torture halfway due to tak ada mood moment. Hahaha

I still hope that one day, I'll get the fresh flowers. If it is not from F, maybe it's from my family or strangers. Hahahaha. I'm that desperate, guys!

Actually, I prefer handbag more than flowers. -..-

But, here's my so-called promise.. I want to buy it myself. No asking, no flirting, no crying for new handbag. Okay maybe, I still need to ask someone to buy it for me because Mr Allowance isn't available for the time being. #boo #Ireallyneedajob

Smartphones keep you updated.

Assalamualaikum and Hi!

I've been wanting to own an Iphone. Whatever Iphone, as long as it is an Iphone. Yeah, I'm that desperate. Due to technology and trend, I must say. Samsung? Too mainstream perhaps. In a denial state, I'm using a Samsung model. I was. (See: past tense)

Why I was using the Samsung phone? It's been on and off for days, or week. And finally it died. RIP, baby. You've been treating me very well. With Instagram, Twitter, Blog, Email, Whatsapp, Facebook and Internet Browser, I could not ask for more. But, after 2 years, you decided to left me outdated. *Tribute to Samsung's phone*

You see, turning back to the old page, I'm using the old model of Nokia. No camera, no selfie (I don't really a fan of selfie actually) But I'm a music person. I listen to the music a lot. Even during the boring kuliah, sometimes. LOL By the way, it is F's phone. Only available for texting and calling. Nothing else. You see, this boy, he gives me this phone, and he's using Samsung Note and whatever phones (he always changes his phone), and let me hide under my table while texting him with this phone. *Well, I'm a girl okayyyy*

Before this, I was fully equipped with the news from internet. I don't need to switch on my laptop in order to browse for information. Especially when it comes to checking email and reading E-News and fashion stuff (cey).

It's been a month since I'm back to the old me when I was still in Form 1. Using a simple model of Nokia. Just to fill up my days with a little information from this boy actually. Nothing about news or entertainment. He never like it. He prefers his own latest news. Makan, minum, in and out of the house and whatevs la guys.

My roommate, the person whose bed is next to mine, bought a new smartphone yesterday. Lucky girl! Ish! And due to my muka kesian, and complaining about not reading Whatsapp messages from our class group, she lend me her Samsung phone which she used before. Masya Allah, so kind of her. Need to belanja makan once I become a rich person one day, LOL. In sha Allah.

So, yeah, I can read the whatsapp messages again guys. I'm not outdated anymore. You see, technology is so addictive. People in all age range are using smartphones nowadays. Only a few use simple phone, and that minority includes me!

I'm ready to read the old feeds right after I'm subscribing the internet later. You see, be a Nurul Fatin is not easy. You have to work on your own in order to get what you want. So, do you wanna be a Nurul Fatin? Good, be yourself. LOL

I wish my Nokia (F's) is available for Whatsapp. At least. Well, at least I know the latest gossips right? Hehehehe. Joking! At least I know either we have class or not, at least I know that tomorrow is my turn for presentation and whatnot.

Actually, there's this task that Mr Raj asked us to do. Read the whole module of EDU. And it happens that I don't read the novel because I'm too concentrate on AJL last night. And I'm sad because Hafiz..... ah, drop it!

Oh, let me deal with the wifi first. I really really need to read the Whatsapp. 

p/s: Don't tell F :p

Dr. Love talks about early marriage.

Assalamualaikum and Hi!

Well, well, well.. speak of the devil, I was about to write and throw my thought about this issue but it happens that I read about this on one of the blogger's blog. (Is that the word?)

When we talk about marriage, every love birds want to get married as soon as they declare their love and changing vows and whatnot. Easy to say, they are getting serious in their relationship even though they are still young and free. But, that's not the issue to be raised here guys.

Majority of you might think that,if you have been in a serious relationship for years, so it's about time to stand up and say what you wanna say.

"Mom, Dad.. I'm getting married."

"It's already 3 years (or more), and I think I'm ready to marry the man of my life, Mom."

"He asked me to marry him when we were walking at the park. With the helium balloons attached with a diamond ring."

So, you think your parents will simply melt away listening to your romantic moments? Well, some do, some don't.

I'm not trying to demotivate any early love birds but trust me guys, at some points, we can't be selfish and all we can think is just for ourselves. Sometimes, it matters to think of people who revolve around us. 

Dear boys, you not only marry the daughter, but you're marrying the family as well.

Dear girls, early marriage is not a trend, it's a sunnah.

Dear both boys and girls, marriage is not a gamble game. It's about responsibilities, future, changing lifestyles, and seeking bless for the hereafter.

Plenty of you (including strangers, family, friends) are asking me, why I'm not married. These are the reasons:

• Our relationship is turning 5. Not 5 days, not 5 months but it's 5 years. Equals to 60 months. Quite a lot, isn't it?
• I'm turning 22 and F is turning 23 anytime soon. We started this relationship when I was 17 and getting serious few months afterwards.
• I'm quite stable because next year, in sha Allah, I'll be completing my degree and F is working in Shah Alam.
• We're serious, but do we trust long distance relationship? Not seeing each other for at least 6 months. Don't know what we actually do.

It's about trust, it's about time, it's about bless, it's about qadak and qadar.

Plus point, I'm still 21 and turning 22. *Listening to Taylor Swift's 22 Song."

As a normal girl, I do want to get married with my own kind of Mr Right. There was a time, I think I wanna get married because it's a trend. Come on, dude. Having babies and raising up our children together sound good but not so good. Knowing children nowadays. I have to discuss to my future H, either to put them in public school or homeschooling. I'm that pathetic, guys.

I'm the second child in the family and F is the third. So you know how huge our responsibilities towards our siblings are?

HOWEVER (I have to highlight this word because this is the climax of the post)

No matter how strong we are, how big my trust towards F and vice versa, there'll always the devil who try to destroy us. Oh, let's not talk about this. It makes me wanna cry some more.

This is the price that we have to pay for our long relationship with no official attached. Look, we try our best to prevent from any bad mouths but no matter how  hard we try, it still there. Some people are not happy with us. And they will say anything that can make you hate us too.

"You know, they are not married. They're super young. Can their marriage lasts forever if they marry at a very young age. You see, this girl is not mature. She's still jumping here and there, still study, still depending."

How I wish I can fix everything and correcting their words.

How on Earth you know I'm a depending person? You live with me, then you'll know how hard my life is. How I manage to struggle for my family, for myself? How DARE you say anything that you yourself don't really sure. I'm doing behind your back because I'm that particular of perspective. I'm not showing off. It feels like showing off your butt when you're doing good and you try to show it to the world. I don't know where the pahala goes. I'm sorry to say this and I know I'm not perfect.

I'm so happy to see some people are lucky enough to have whatever they want in their lives. Their decisions do not bring any impact to the other group.

Bless them, and May Allah grant them eternal happiness.

We hold on one principle, let's the whole world hate you and put you to the worst level of your life, but don't ever give up. By the time we give up, that's the real victory for them.

My plan is easy, getting married at whatever age, having kids like 10 or 20 at least, raising them and getting old. Okay 10 or 20 kids is a big lie. I just want 2 kids or 4 kids maximum fullstop

So guys, for the time being, I don't know either to answer you or give you THAT look if you ask me,

"Kitak tek bilaaaa gik nak nikah?" - (Maksud: Bila lagi nak kahwin?)

And to those haters, this is my question.

"Kitak tek bila gik nak sampe seru mok bertaubat?" - (Maksud: Bila lagi nak sampai seru nak bertaubat?)

At some level, I'm that mean.

To those who really hope and pray for me, God knows how happy I am. 

Actually, I'm getting married. LOL - Controversy.

p/s: Please check my error, so malas to read and correct them

Le Coughing Moment

Assalamualaikum and Hi!

See, I toldya! The availability of the wifi force me to write some more about my boring day.

Mind you, there are only a few of us are staying in the hostel even it is our FIRST week for this semester. And that includes Sha. Why everybody are so eager to go back home and left only a few of us here hah? #poorthing #foreveralone #dengki *I'm joking, man!*

Anyways, as I was lying down in whatever styles that suits my condition just now, I was reading "If I Stay" by Gayle Forman. I watched the movie few days ago and it was awesome, dude! I can give you that.

Since it's the first day of my huhuhaha of the month, I think every pose I made feels so wrong. No matter how proper I sit or lying with my back, it still hurts me. Specifically, my tummy. Remember singing tummy? No, it's not because of the singing tummy but it's because of the major problem that come and visit me every month. Don't worry guys, I'm immune to it. It just feels so wrong if no Miss Senggugut come and greet me for the first few days.

So yeah, being a melancholy girl who suffers from period pain while reading the novel on bed, suddenly I heard a gross sound from downstairs. Actually it is quite confusing to decide either it is a cough or a puke. Way to kill the moment, mate!

Oh did I told you, our humble room is located right above the new 3in1 shower room? I'm pretty handsome cute sure that this person who coughed and puke in combo is using this 3in1 shower room. And you know how I feel? Gross man!

Come to think of it, after being such a rational and negotiable person in this entire planet, I forgive her. Bless her. Deep inside me, I pray and hope that she is okay. 

So that I can continue reading the novel and continue changing my sitting position. Let's hope for that. *wearing pink socks*

Oh well, pretend the weather guys, I'm currently study at University of Birmingham. LOL. One fine day, in sha Allah.

To the Cough Lady, please puke and cough with a little courtesy. I feel uneasy to the point that I want to knock on the shower room's door and said,

"Hello Miss, we all can cough and puke too in case you wonder."

Now I understand how annoying people can be when they hear my cough. Luckily, I puke silently. #GrossStatementEver

First class breakfast.

Assalamualaikum and Hi!

Oh just so you know, once I start writing on this blog, I'll do the same thing for the next few days until I get boring again and run out of ideas and disappear from your life. Sigh!

So, I'm not actually good in eating. I mean, having a balance meal. Hence, the weight. LOL 

I have this one gross habit. And I wish it is not my habit after all. Hehehehehe. Seriously, it never come to my mind that I have to write about this. You guys should finish this reading before decided to agree either this is a gross post or not. :p

I always have a problem of a singing tummy when I'm not taking my breakfast every morning. At least, I must eat one Hup Seng and a plain water before heading to the class. It would be a total disaster if you can hear my tummy sings a metal song. Seriously, I feel insecure. Malam pun sama! Hish, what a shame!

So, I  always remind my tummy to behave well when I'm not taking my breakfast, but singing tummy will always be a singing tummy. You go, dude! It's not cool!

Eventually, I told myself to start having a breakfast. At least, keropok or any Hup Seng-type-of-roti.

Since the tender of our cafeteria has changed, we are blessed with various choice of food. You know, what this means? It means, there are a lot of investment to be made and the cashflow is rapidly increases. 

Like the previous tender, the food was very limited. You have no choice that you'll find that you eat the same thing everyday.

Now, I'm blessed with a lot of roti, a lot of kuih, a lot of lauk, and if I crave for ABC, I don't have to spend RM10 to take a ride to Sarikei in order to eat a delicious RM3-ABC. Yeay!

Just now I had my RM2.40 chicken floss roti. Last year I only had 3 for RM1-kuih for my breakfast. I wouldn't ask for more because by the time I have it all, my money will say bye-bye to Miss Big Spender. I love food but food don't love me. Poor thing!

Speaking of gross, let's not talk about that for this time. *while eating my chicken floss roti*

No more 35sen kuih this time, guys. And the problem is still the same, either I take a 35sen kuih or RM2.40 chicken floss roti, the food still hate me. And the singing tummy still want to be my bestfriend. #boo

Till then. hugs and kisses.

Past is past, let's look forward to your future.

Assalamualaikum and Hi!

First and foremost, I truly am sorry for taking to long to post a simple entry in this tiny tiny world of mine. The holidays were fully equipped with chores in the house despite for not going anywhere. No, seriously guys, I'm not going anywhere minus 1 week at my aunt's house sleeping next to my grannnie! 

Okay, let's make this short and straight.

Do you notice any changes in this blog? The obvious one? Yeah right, I've changed the template. To show my real maturity and the real Fateen I guess. The previous template looks cute but I've been listening to several comments (critics) from my friends that my template looks like a year-6-girl's blog. Okay okay, I change the template. Now it really looks like a real early 20s girl's blog. LOL

There are few things that I would like to say here. And I know, some of you are waiting for the next part for Sabar Itu Indah. Guys, I'm so sorry that I have to urge myself to tell you that sooner or later, I am going to delete every part of Sabar Itu Indah that I've published before. I know, I'm so into the novel like you that I'll feel so excited when I read your comments under the posts. But, I have to move forward. I'm going to send the manuscript of the novel to a few publishers real soon. I'm still considering the right medium for the novel and my other cerpens. I need to appreciate myself, really. I am considering some recommended ideas from my love ones. They ask me to give it a shot, sending my manuscript to the upper level. 

Dear my supportive friends and family (I don't take you as my followers/readers, you are all my family), I would like to thank to all of you for supporting me all this while and being loyal to Sabar Itu Indah. Don't worry, ada rezeki and all that, I'll let you know here okay, and I'll make sure F will let you know too. Even though, there were several attempts that had been made by you in order to meet me, and we still can't make it, I really really want you to know that I love you and I appreciate every single thing that you've said to me. Without all of you, takkan ada Em, Ann, Sofea dan Faiq.

Kalau rindu Sofea dan Faiq, singgahlah kat sini dan tinggalkan komen okay. Sofea dan Faiq pasti akan jenguk kat sini nanti. Dan yang penting, kalau ada rezeki, Sofea dan Faiq akan diceritakan dalam bentuk buku. In sha Allah. Tak ada rezeki pun tak apa, Sofea dan Faiq akan datang sini balik lah. Hehehe.

Actually, nak cakap pasal tahun 2014 tapi lupa. LOL

Oh the best part about end of 2014?

I met Abang Mie! Hehehe

What? Want bukti aa? Okay nah, nah nah!

Of, click on the photos for enlargement to see my eyebag, my jerawat and all.

He ate my nasi ayam penyet by the way! #boo

And I didn't do much during the holidays. Not even Part 15. So malas and so exhausted after signing in to housewife club. Hahahaha. 

But Part 15 will be the end of the novel and I can promise you, that is going to be the best part of the novel. Ceyyy.

Nah, here's another thing for you. The sneak peak for Part 14. And sorry, I MIGHT NOT publishing the full version here, guys.

Part 14 - Sneak peak

“Thanks sayang. 5 more minutes please.” Ann menyambut huluran baju yang dipilihnya daripada walk-in-wardrobe mereka. Muka Ann memang slumber sambil tangan sibuk mengelap rambut yang basah dengan badan berbalut robe. Pintu bilik mandi ditutup semula. Tak apalah Em, sabar itu indah. Maka, tunggulah dengan penuh kesabaran.

Tidak lama kemudian, Ann keluar dengan memegang pregnancy test di tangannya. Siap dilindung dengan tuala yang digunakan untuk mengelap rambutnya tadi.

“Actually, saya belum tengok lagi keputusan kat pregnancy test ni. Nak tengok sama dengan awak and nak tahu how we react.” Ann mengalihkan tuala di tangannya dan membawa pregnancy test itu dekat dengan Em.

Keputusan yang ditunjukkan pada pregnancy test itu membuatkan mereka sama-sama terdiam. Lama memerhati pregnancy test itu untuk menghadam apakah keputusannya. Em membawa Ann ke dalam pelukannya. Setitis air matanya tumpah. Dia tidak mahu menunjukkan riak wajahnya kepada Ann yang jelas masih memgang dan memandang pregnancy test di depannya.

Rezeki ada di mana-mana dan datang dalam pelbagai bentuk. Kadang-kadang apa yang kita minta dan harapkan kita tak dapat, tapi yang kita taknak, itulah yang datang kepada kita. Ann melepaskan pregnancy test ditangannya dan membalas pelukan Em.

“I’m sorry.” Itu sahaja yang diluahkan Ann di depannya. Makin erat pelukan Em.

“It’s okay sayang. Semua yang jadi ada hikmahnya.” Em memimpin tangan Ann untuk membawa Ann keluar daripada bilik dan turun menyertai Izah dan Hazwan yang sibuk bermain dengan Sofea dan Faiq. Baru turun satu anak tangga, Ann menarik semula Em masuk ke dalam bilik. Dia mengambil pregnancy test yang dilepaskannya tadi. Memerhati semula, sama ada terdapat perubahan ataupun tidak.

“Kita ada satu lagi pregnancy test yang Izah beli ni. Wanna try again?” Em mahu mangambil plastik di atas meja tepi katil tapi Ann menggeleng kepalanya.

“You know, we can’t change the result. Kita mesti terima dengan hati yang terbuka kan?” tangan Em diusap perlahan.

Sebaik sahaja turun ke bawah, Em terus menyertai Hazwan di ruang tamu sementara Ann dan Izah di dapur. Tak adalah nak memasak sebenarnya, lebih kepada memberi ruang kepada masing-masing untuk berbual bersama kawannya sendiri. Sofea dan Faiq hanyalah ubat nyamuk semata-mata.

So tahu tak negative ke positive? Cuba teka? Kalau banyak jawapan betul, saya publish part ni. LOL

Before I end my rumblings here, do you guys really set goals every year? Me? My new year resolution? I don't really have one. Seriously. But everyday, I have this one goal.. I want to be a better person both dunya and the hereafter. That's all.

Thanks. Love loads! Kalau yang baca sampai habis tu untunglah dapat tahu sneak peak part seterusnya Sabar itu Indah. Kalau boring dan tak habis baca, tak tahulah ada selit antara part terakhir dalam Sabar Itu Indah. Hehehe

Night. Assalamualaikum.